upndownupndownupndownup

Last week we went far away for a long time (on a few gallons of gas and with one night babysitting). The picture is the view from our room. There were flowers waiting for me when we got there. We were able to check in early and just lounge around. We wore the hotel bathrobes and giggled. They were not slimming- but they were comfy and the view from the balcony was lovely. It was like being on a cruise ship. And our son in charge of our other son only called twice (or was it 3 times) to ask us what our plans were and where we were and when he could drop off his little brother where he (little not big) was spending the night. Having told him, each of us did, several times, writing it down in multiple spots, just wasn't the same as hearing us say so in the moment. Still he did start to pick up a little tone on our part and didn't call any more (that night).

A little deep breathing and I was back on my exotic cruise ship. We strolled around the old shops, we ate a lovely dinner -ok we ate too much of a lovely dinner. We had room service breakfast, we strolled and shopped more -barely escaping from a shopkeeper who may not have recovered fully from the 60's yet and surviving the scathing look from the pompous one in the next shop. I got a call there about Jesse and the canceled preschool class -now combined with the one on the days that don't really work for us and the teacher he doesn't know but I am weathering this crisis much better than I would have 15 years ago.

So any way we got home tired and happy and the next day dawned bright and early as cloudless summer days are wont to do but the clouds, so to speak rolled in. With the mail as it turned out which contained - a plethora, at least that word works here- of books ordered from eBay in an obsessive/compulsive/forgetful/impulsive bit of pointing and clicking Caleb had done. He does have the money to cover it but both the amount spent and what he spent it on (oh, I suppose I have to specify nothing risque) is just embarassing. At least to me -and if it doesn't embarass Caleb that is even worse. I was my usual sweet, subtle, calm self handling the whole thing.

That was three days ago and Caleb and I are probably both still shaking (a little less crying) and the books, unopened, are in the back of a car. Tune in here to see where they end up.

Last night we moved my mom back in -until someone can stay at her house with her but we leave all this pretty vague. Not for her sake alone. I think it is easy for all of us this way. All the options are open. Still- other than a little hand waving I think we have communicated pretty well without having to be too blunt and say, "Look mom. You are 91. There is no up hill from here."And I'm not really worrying about getting the right pads for you to refinish that wood trim yourself -but I pack whatever you want and I notice you don't put your painting clothes in. Little by little we all inch towards it but we try not to mention the elephant in the rrom too much.

Tonight Jesse had me call Carolyn and he told her whe needed to come home tomorrow 0"the day next to taday" he helpfully explained and that she could even wake him up by ticling him in the morning. This is a high honor but still she could not so he tried to arrange to "come where she is coming." This sister-going-to-college-thing is very hard and not a board book in sight to help us get through it. We could find one on 2 mommies or 2 daddies or 3 penguins but a sister in college -now that's abnormal.