true SHORT story

It was my original intention that my next blog (ie this one) would finish out our travel saga- how a simple hike was fraught and I got mad because a sibling of the (most) challenged one on this hike wanted to go faster and I felt put upon (only I would've worded it much more interestingly and sympathy inducingly) etc etc. Also I intended to follow up my last entry within a week(not because I think anyone is waiting but because it is my idea of trying to be more disciplined, like about sentences that are too long and all that, and the gratuitous uses of parentheses). So why the sudden motivation? What suddenly surpassed an accumulation of 25 years of patiently walking along with walkers and wheelchairs and crutches and whine whine whine? - the Home Depot greeter.

All I wanted to do was buy some paint while I had free time having dropped the littlest one at VBS and guiltily escaped helping with said VBS. My punishment was when I walked into Home Depot the woman handing out the 10% off coupon (for things unrelated to my errand) gave it to me with a warning it only was good for a few more days and then exclaimed, "I just love short people!" (that would clearly include me). I stopped, cemented to the spot by my desperate attempt to think of the appropriate response. And I laughed because what else could I do? This encouraged her to explain the she really loved short people, everything about them was so tiny and they were just so adorable and extra weight didn't show on them-unlike her "apple booty" (enriching my vocabulary and building my self esteem), and her mother had been short and look I even had tiny feet and really who "wanted to be average" when short people were just so cute? I am not making this up. I am adorable. Dr. Adorable that is.

Clearly there must be a plan in my life and purpose in the universe because really this stuff couldn't just happen.